Autumn.. don't leave me, yet.

I am not ready for the icy cold weather. And since I don't believe in any of the available gods, my options to pray for better weather are out. There is always the agnostic gateaway but I guess the pride weights heavier..

But really, who would you wish things from if you do not have a God on call or even a mom right by you? Therefore I just have to let autumn go. 

I was already grumpy this morning, while waiting for the 30-min late shuttle when it was 25 degrees (that is in fahrenheit : a pseud note my European readers) and literally feeling like the ultimate snowwoman of all times. Hungry, sleepy, freezing and desperately hoping that the experiment from last night has worked, at the same time remembering good old noblesse oblige times of mine. The times that I felt like a winner, not a still-trying-to-get-out-of-school  frozen being. But there I was...

When I made it to lab, another ego-fluctuating day of mine has officially started. Experiment (check), coffee (check), run away before weirdo coffee-man sees me (check), waste time with silly emails and unnecessary networking sites (check). There, it was already noon! Where did the half of my day go? (Visit Grad Hacker if you don't want to end up like me) What was I saying.. ego?.. right. The only thing that crashes into pieces each day but somehow manages to fix itself up the day after: Ego. Or mine, in particular. You wonder who is the girl that tries to explain her mentor why she forgot to add enzyme into an enzymatic reaction? Yeah, now you know me better (by the way the right answer is that her head is nothing but a smashed pumpkin today).

Ugh, back to Autumn.. Glendon Mellow had this post, which drew my attention due to the picture of choice instead of its concept. While I have no problem stating this fact shamelessly, I think I calmed down after seeing the photo on his post, anyways. That was it! I just missed autumn already! I just wanted to walk on dry leaves and focus on romance rather than endless postdoc applications.. I don't want to freeze, not that I care dying old in a dark corner of a lab in nowhere one day. All I wanted was colorful leaves.. Now what is left is higher gas bills.

(and just like that, she has lost it..)

Random things meme

I just figured that Stephanie Z has tagged me in her randomness meme. It has been a while since I have filled out such a form (forever maybe?) which makes it fun. Here we go:

Things I was doing 10 years ago:

Choosing my major in high school (gosh! what a start!). Deciding if I should study theatrical art or science. Playing the guitar in high school band. Dying my hair to blue. Leaving my coffee mug unwashed for days. Dreaming as much as I was today. Trusting people more than now.

Things on my to do list today: 

Learn how to cook more like my mother. Being more patient and saving my choopy thoughts to myself more often. Getting my PhD degree in a couple months. Publish not perish. Working on the rationale/emotion ratio. To act. Reading more poems, going back to Guatemala and choosing my wedding dress. 

Snacks I love:

Jello, black olives, carrots, plain yogurt with bread and grapes.

Things I would do if I were a millionaire:

I never want to be a millionaire, even the idea freaks me out, so I skip this.

Places I've lived:

Apartment, flat, dormitory, farm, house, gym and rented-rooms variously located in Istanbul, New York and Atlanta.

Jobs I've had:

Selling salami in a supermarket stand, giving away food tickets in BP, translating English to Turkish in many occasions, reading books to disabled people, teaching tango, teaching chemistry in a local high school in Atl, teaching assistant to a biochemistry course and tutoring many more. 

I won't tag anyone else just yet and I will edit the list if something comes up to my mind. But for now, there, you know me a little more ;)

Later.

If you believe, they put a woman on the moon

I found this comic by  Dinasour Comics  hilarious. While I think we still need time to break into the big boys club,  recent prosperings makes me believe that everything is possible and can be achieved with enough dedication. Therefore, yes we can!

Wedding crashers

Life is keeping me very busy and there is so much to raise voice to around me these days. However when I ran an into this by Reuters, I ended up speechless..

- can you see what you are doing is a mistake, before actually doing it?

bummer.

Why do societies fail?

I have written about evolution of cultures before. Below is a nice talk by Jared Diamond about the failure of societies. If you haven't read his book "Guns, Germs and Steel" here goes a very good summary by him. Stay tuned for more on cultural evolution and selection of societies.

People are strange

I do strongly feel like a stranger in this country recently. I must admit, I suspect it has something to do with soon-to-arrive elections however it is not a feeling that I have not tasted before. 

Living in the south part of the states, you get accustomed to being a stranger. Just like a mask ball that is, after some time people realize that you are a visitor no more and make a living here (at least for a while), yet the masks drop. That warm, cozy southern tribute leaves itself to annoying superficial dialogues or judgemental looks each time you do something "unamerican".  Many times I did have troubles speaking my own language in public. Yet having to talk to someone-in-person-in-another-language can create disasters time to time. My very ex-roommate has warned and explained to me why I should speak English with my Turkish friends even by the phone (now you know why she is the ex). I remember this guy in blockbuster that I have run into with my fiance once.  He had just stopped right in front of us and did not move his eyes until we stopped talking (which in fact is a difficult task for me to do) however I did. I was scared. 

Some people love to label and they label you as "the other" or "the opportunist using their resources" or "the one who steals their jobs and education" et cetera. The list goes on and on and after some time you get immuned to these comments. (Yeah I am stealing the knowledge, now you can not write a stoichiometric equation but I can, haha, loser!) Apparently the fact that education is open to everyone and I am just here to get a doctorate degree does not make any difference to some. My life is not structured around expectations from other people and I am aware that stupidity and ignorance has no race and can not be generalized no matter how common you ran into them but rationale does not always diminish disturbance.

No need to say that living in another country (doesn't matter which one) is hard. Merely I really want to understand what is the resource of the speak-my-language and/or "do not make any comments on elections if you don't vote" attitude is coming from. Don't they get it? Why are you so proud of your country? What did you do to have the privilage (as some calls it)? Don't you have any other peculiarity to be happy about? I can comprehend being proud of your childs rank in high school, but, why flag? This rhetoric sessions can go endless..

Despite the inevitably unpleasant emotions that surround many people, we, the strangers of this country, have all the rights to speak up and make a comment on what's going on where we live. This might come off as shocking but we are living in this world, altogether. Yet it is not only a matter of your cozy county's policy, darn right there is more! (wink wink) And there is whole a lot more to say, but I really can not pull the best words for the day. Later.

Science to Life - no more.

Karen Ventii, the sciblogger of Science to Life and a very good friend of mine has just announced that she will no longer be posting on her blog:

"This will be the last post for Science To Life. Due to changes in my professional life I will no longer maintain the blog. I have thoroughly enjoyed writing here and I hope you have enjoyed reading the blog. Take care!"

She is the one who introduced me to world of science blogging, so I wanted to thank her and say that she will be missed.

Good luck in the "real" world and thanks for all the fish, Karen.